


Does It Spark Joy?

by InsightfulInsomniac



Series: dads!Klaine (aka the Adventures of the Anderson-Hummels and Co.) [19]
Category: Glee
Genre: Embarrassment for poor Dalton, Fluff, Humor, M/M, again...poor dalton, dads!Klaine, klaine kiddos, married!klaine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:07:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23196043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsightfulInsomniac/pseuds/InsightfulInsomniac
Summary: Dalton Anderson-Hummel has been roped into his dads’ Marie Kondo-ing scheme, with today’s task being the re-organization of his closet. While they’re working, much to Dalton’s mortification, his dads find more than just old clothes buried in the back of his closet.Humor and a lot of embarrassment for poor Dalton, but Klaine being the best dads ever (and mentions of Dalton/Sawyer, my beloved OCs).
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel
Series: dads!Klaine (aka the Adventures of the Anderson-Hummels and Co.) [19]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1364230
Comments: 9
Kudos: 99





	Does It Spark Joy?

**Author's Note:**

> Day five of social distancing as an extrovert. This sucks so badly....
> 
> ....so have some dads!Klaine! Enjoy!

Dalton would just like to say that he is not a hoarder, thank you very much.

Even though he hasn’t worn that one red pair of converse in over two years doesn’t mean it doesn’t have a specific purpose in his closet. It’s an important piece of his life, whether it gets used often or not.

Okay, maybe Dalton is a little bit of a hoarder.

“Keep or donate?” His dad asks, holding up the pair of shoes in question. “I haven’t seen these in your rotation for a long time.”

Recently, Dad decided to binge watch _Tidying Up with Marie Kondo_ , and he somehow roped Pops into it all as well. The two of them have been organizational fiends, KonMari-ing the house one room at a time. Some of their kids had taken to it like fish to water (namely, Tracy, who whipped her room and closet into shape within a day, and Finn, who is a self-proclaimed minimalist to begin with), while others, like Dalton, needed a little extra push.

Or maybe a lot of hand-holding. Hence why his two dads are currently sorting through his closet, making Dalton choose between keep and donate for each of his possessions while he stays sprawled on his bed in obvious displeasure.

“Oh my god, Kurt, look!” Blaine grins, pulling an old t-shirt out of the dark recesses of Dalton’s closet. “It’s one of the Evans & Anderson-Hummel Disney trip shirts that Sam made!”

“God, those things are garish,” Kurt scoffs with a laugh, examining the neon orange fabric fondly. “This vacation was over five years ago. Why do you still have this in your closet, Dalton?”

Dalton sighs defeatedly. “Like everything else I’ve stockpiled for years, I have no idea, Dad.”

Blaine shrugs. “I don’t care why you’ve kept it, but I’m not giving this away. I’m keeping it.”

Kurt opens his mouth to respond, but Blaine cuts him off with a pointed look. “It sparks joy, babe. So much joy.”

Kurt just shakes his head amusedly, reaching for a box on the top shelf of Dalton’s closet. “Okay, Dalton, look alive. Two more boxes to get through.”

Dalton merely gives his dad a thumbs up from his place on the bed, staring up at the ceiling distantly.

“First we have an old pair of jeans,” Kurt narrates, pulling the items out one-by-one. “And then we have an old sweatshirt from middle school swim team... Dalton, does this even fit?”

“I have absolutely no idea,” he replies, squeezing his eyes shut in hopes that he could fall asleep and finally escape the organizational hell he’s being subjected to.

“Okay, well, I’m going to vote to donate that one already,” Kurt continues. “And now we have — oh.”

“Oh,” Blaine echoes.

The few seconds of silence that follow are deafening, and Dalton’s eyes snap open as soon as he realizes what is happening.

Panic and mortification wash over him in tidal waves as he sits up, ramrod straight, on the edge of his bed. “Oh my god, I can explain —“

Seeing his dads holding his stash of condoms and lube is a sight Dalton never could have prepared himself for. Never in a million years.

“Dalton, you don’t need to explain anything,” his dad begins carefully, Pops nodding along with him. “You and Sawyer have been together for over a year, it’s perfectly natural —“

“Oh my god,” Dalton squeaks, burying his face in his hands. “Oh my god.”

“We’re just proud that you’re using protection,” Blaine continues gently. “All that matters is that you are being safe.”

“And that you’re respecting each other,” Kurt adds. “Now, we’re not going to interrogate you —“

“Please don’t, just leave me here to die,” Dalton pleads to the floor, refusing to look his parents in the eyes. “I can’t believe this is happening.”

“There’s no need to be embarrassed,” Blaine soothes. “Listen, we get it. We were kids once too —“

“Oh my god, Pops, please, no,” Dalton groans. “Sawyer and I are happy and healthy and always respectful of each other. Is that enough?”

Kurt and Blaine share a look. “Yes. Absolutely,” Kurt replies. “Just know you can always come to us if you need anything.”

“I know,” Dalton grabs his pillow from behind him, burying his face into it. “Now, if you wouldn’t mind, I would appreciate some privacy to forget this ever happened.”

“Of course,” his pops agrees, and both of his parents move to exit his room quickly. 

Kurt sticks his head back into the room. “Don’t think this gets you out of organizing your things, though.”

Dalton groans again. “Oh my god, dad.”

“Okay! Okay. Leaving now.”

After a good ten minutes of wallowing in his embarrassment, Dalton drags himself through the jack-and-jill bathroom to his twin brother’s room, promptly flopping onto his bed.

“Um, hi?” Finn greets confusedly from his desk. “What existential crisis are we dealing with today?”

“Dad and Pops just found my condoms,” Dalton cringes at the still very fresh memory.

“Oh my god.”

“Yeah.”

“What did they say?”

Dalton sighs, rolling over onto his back. “There’s nothing to be ashamed of, this is natural, we’re proud you’re being safe... everything you’d expect from our parents, really.”

Finn considers this for a moment. “Well, that’s definitely as good of a reaction as anyone could have received.”

Dalton makes a pained noise. “And then Pops started talking about when they were kids, and I did NOT want to go there, for god’s sake, it was agonizing enough already.”

Finn snorts. “Sounds like it. Did you throw them away?”

Dalton pauses. “Excuse me?”

“The condoms. Did you throw them away?”

“Why the hell would I do that?”

Finn grins cheekily. “Well, they obviously didn’t spark joy.”

Dalton rolls his eyes. “Oh my god. I hate you.”

“No you don’t.”

“Yes I do. And for the record, they absolutely spark joy ninety-nine percent of the time. Don’t take your data from just the outliers.”

“And you took it too far, Dalton.”

“It’s the truth!”

“Oh my god, I liked you better when you were embarrassed.”

**Author's Note:**

> My friend is starting to binge Glee now that she has time (the only upside to the current global situation), and it’s HYSTERICAL watching someone go through that rollercoaster.
> 
> Find me on tumblr @zigxzag-klaine


End file.
